Teamwork problem personalities and conflicts

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Alexander Pearson
Teamwork problem personalities and conflicts

How hard it would be to work in perfect teams made up of perfect people!!

Most people who work in teams complain about their interpersonal relationships. A relatively large team registers constant turbulence: encounters and disagreements, power struggles, emotional ups and downs with repercussions on the group as a whole, etc ...

A part of the conflict between colleagues can originate in the functions they are entrusted with, but other times people have personality traits or ways of being that make them problematic in practically any organization.

When two people do not have a hierarchy defined by an organization chart and they have to collaborate, four types of situations occur:

  • Cordial consensus: Both professionals have the same level, are willing to work in a complementary way and alternate very dynamically in decisions.
  • Cordial obedience: One of the parties accepts the leadership of the other and both are perfectly in tune, many times establishing a "secret pact".
  • Forced consensus: When two professionals of the same hierarchy face each other, in the long run two things can happen: a) one of them abandons the fight and positions are stabilized by means of a pact or simply by mutual avoidance; or b) it is essential to establish more or less spoken rules, depending on the severity of the confrontation.
  • Forced obedience: When there is an established hierarchy between the two professionals and despite this, the one in a subordinate position refuses to collaborate, a game of nonsense begins that is usually very negative for the company. The very fact of not sharing or hiding information leads to wasting opportunities and ideas.

Contents

  • Traits that hinder teamwork
  • Internal causes of failure
    • Personality
    • Style mismatch
    • Personal problems
  • External causes of failure
    • Mission Impossible
    • Ethical pressure
    • Lack of encouragement
    • Takedown strategies and / or lack of support
  • Problematic professionals
  • Professionals with narcissistic traits
    • How to behave and communicate with a narcissistic boss?
  • Professionals with sensitive / paranoid traits
    • Professionals with paranoid traits are often discovered BECAUSE
      • They are distrustful
      • They are hypersensitive
      • They waterproof their emotions
    • How to behave and communicate with a boss of paranoid traits?
    • Here are some recommendations in the case of being paranoid:
  • Professionals with unstable traits / borderline personality
    • Professionals with borderline traits can be discovered BECAUSE:
    • How to behave and communicate with an unstable boss?
    • The most important thing for an unstable professional is

Traits that hinder teamwork

The first explanation when someone fails in a team is the typical comment: "I was not good for this position." With this we indicate an internal cause of failure, for example, lack of technical preparation. Other times the professional becomes ill or is involved in personal problems that reduce their effectiveness. However, these two factors are by far not the most important. In general, a professional does not adapt to a team due to personality problems and confrontation with the company culture. Let's examine these internal and external factors.

Internal causes of failure

(In order of importance)

Personality

  • Very susceptible and hypersensitive to criticism.
  • Excess ego: intrusive, invades the privacy of colleagues.
  • Selfishness.
  • Emotional instability.
  • Emotional coldness.
  • Dogmatic, rigid.
  • Bad communicator.

Style mismatch

  • False expectations or goals.
  • Build on previous experiences that do not work in the current situation.
  • Incorrect instructions received from superiors.
  • Incorrect perception of the company and environment.
  • Underappreciation of subordinates and collaborators.
  • Inability to assume a transformational role.

Personal problems

  • Family illnesses
  • Somatic or mental illnesses.
  • Others: divorce, family instability, etc..

External causes of failure

Mission Impossible

  • Unattainable objectives due to market evolution.
  • Lack of initially promised means.

Ethical pressure

  • The context of the company forces layoffs, ...
  • We receive superior "unethical" instructions.

Lack of encouragement

  • Economical. We earn the same regardless of our performance.
  • Lack of professional career.
  • Stimulating goals are missing.

Takedown strategies and / or lack of support

  • Of the superiors.
  • From the companions.
  • Of the subordinates.

What differentiates a normal professional from a problematic professional is precisely their ability to adapt. Let's look at this profile of people unable to adapt, people who go where they go end up being problematic people.

Problematic professionals

As a general rule, we can affirm that any excessively pronounced feature in our way of being, in the long run will bring us problems, especially if we occupy a coordinating or directing position. However, without spinning so finely, some professionals have a personality type that invariably leads them to successive failures and can even cause illnesses in the organization as a whole..

We are going to examine three very typical profiles of professionals with problems: the narcissistic, the sensitive, and the borderline or unstable. All three introduce serious distortions into the life of any organization..

A good portion of people have problematic personality traits, but they tend to compensate with intelligence and other virtues..

Professionals with narcissistic traits

The narcissist is a person with feelings of greatness, a need to awaken admiration in others and an inability to empathize with people, that is, an inability to have genuine appreciation for other people.

This lack of genuine affection will not prevent the narcissist from declaring himself in love or assuring us that he feels an appreciation for our work and our person, but his love is always interested. What really motivates you is feeling admired and cared for by others.

He overestimates his capabilities and assumes that everyone agrees to value him as he values ​​himself. He also often fantasizes about his achievements, overestimating his contribution and despising that of others.

When the narcissistic practitioner has no leadership or directive responsibilities, he may attempt to displace the group leader by drawing weak elements in the group to him, whom he pampers for praise. But when you have managerial responsibilities it can be extremely dangerous for an organization. To begin with, you will reject any hint of criticism and may even take action against those who have dared to criticize you. Another interesting detail to detect narcissites is this ease with which they are injured by the softest criticisms.

Sometimes they can have a great capacity for work and sacrifice. But in reality they are always driven by a personal ambition.

The intelligent narcissist is an exquisite manipulator of the interpersonal relationship. He's going to make us believe that he cares a lot about us, but we're actually a pawn for his particular game. Each person is assigned a specific value in their strategy.

Another significant clue to detect a narcissist is precisely the contempt he shows towards simple people who "do not paint anything".

The narcissist guides his interpersonal relationships in a very operative way. Friendships are made according to the benefit that can be derived from them, and this is valid even at the level of their intimate relationships: the couple is a means to reinforce their self-esteem. Furthermore, good feelings (solidarity, concern for a partner's situation, etc.) can be simulated to impress others or achieve their ends, but they are never genuinely felt..

Professionals with narcissistic traits can be discovered BECAUSE:

  • They are envious.
  • They are very ambitious.
  • They react badly to criticism.
  • They are incapable of emotional solidarity (empathy).
  • They guide their interpersonal relationships so that they can take advantage of them.
  • They are unable to give esteem.

How to behave and communicate with a narcissistic boss?

Beware of the seductive arts of a narcissistic boss. It can make you believe that you are the essential person to do this or that job but in reality it is not like that. Narcissists go through frequent depressive crises. The smallest criticism can make them contact reality, and then deep crises are triggered. In such cases they can channel their feelings of tension and irritability in the form of aggression towards others, calling them incapable. These reactions are usually totally disproportionate in relation to the events that motivate their reprimand. Some practical rules for dealing and communicating with these types of narcissistic bosses:

  • Don't be manipulated.
  • Put a stop to the demands of your narcissistic boss. Make him understand his limits as a human being.
  • Avoid being part of those who are around you applauding you because in the long run these types of managers fall from grace and together with them everyone who followed and cheered.
  • When the narcissistic boss asks you for something impossible, try to negotiate his request in a realistic way..
  • Don't expect recognition for your work.
  • Communicate with the narcissistic boss trying to be friendly and not standing out.

A narcissist hardly has a solution, unless he changes in a very profound way. In any case, here are some "impossible" exercises for a narcissist:

  • Taking a genuine interest in others.
  • Think of brilliant subordinates and empower them.
  • Learn to accept criticism and even provoke it.
  • Mitigate resentment.

Professionals with sensitive / paranoid traits

The essential characteristic of the person with hypersensitivity or paranoid traits is distrust and seeing threats from all sides. They tend to be introverted, willful and hyper-responsible professionals, very into their own things and not very fond of mass gatherings. When they have to speak in public they tend to get quite nervous, especially because of the fear that they will be teased. Like the narcissist, they share resentment as a defensive spring.

The most descriptive traits are therefore hypersensitivity and suspicion but also the lack of manifest emotion. This type of person is cold and distant, does not have a sense of humor and does not show tender or emotional attitudes. He is actually driven into this coldness as a defense against his own frailty..

Professionals with paranoid traits are often discovered BECAUSE

They are distrustful

  • Suspicious, they believe that they are conspired against.
  • They fear being betrayed and look for "signs of threats".
  • They are reserved and avoid criticism.
  • They may have intense professional and personal jealousy.

They are hypersensitive

  • They are easily offended and humiliated.
  • From anything they "make a mountain".
  • They are in permanent tension "just in case".

They waterproof their emotions

  • They take as a virtue being very objective and little given to tender emotions (which they believe is a weakness).
  • They appear cold because deep down they are fragile. However, they can learn to be ruthless.
  • They have no sense of humor.
  • It is difficult for them to participate in a group, unless they occupy a dominant position.
  • They can be selfish and distant.

Now, not everything is negative:

  • The hypersensitive person can overcome his suspicious tendency and develop the positive part of his way of being. In this case, your colleagues will consider you a keen and trained observer..
  • Hypersensitive people who manage to overcome suspicion are endowed with a sixth sense of great value.
  • The insensitivity that these people often show is due, deep down, to a defense, because they are terrified of emotions. But when they have the courage to face them, they can even develop overacting. When they channel their fragile emotionality towards a utopia they can develop extraordinary levels of effort and voluntarism.

How to behave and communicate with a boss of paranoid traits?

  • Asymmetric courtesy: be friendly even if you don't get any warmth from the paranoid.
  • Sincerity and no excuses: You have to acknowledge the faults and apologize if that's the case.
  • Respect and no jokes.

Here are some recommendations in the case of being paranoid:

  • You must learn to relativize your suspicions and not rush into your actions.
  • You must learn to live ignoring the opinion of others and preserving your self-esteem from that opinion.
  • You must assume that in a team there will always be people who are not going to like you.
  • You must not be swayed by suspicion. You must always behave in a cordial and open emotional tone.

Professionals with unstable traits / borderline personality

These traits are observed above all in young professionals, since basically it is a question of a lack of maturation of the personality. It basically consists of a fragile self-image that leads to not knowing what you want or who you love, with strong fluctuations from euphoria to depression.

The professional with unstable or borderline personality traits is impulsive in aspects related to their work but, more frequently, in areas of their personal life. His inner life is dominated by brief passionate impulses, which are exhausted as if from lack of batteries, but so intense that he does not know how to give them up and which also provides him with the only thing that really interests him: extreme emotions..

They do not tolerate loneliness. They can launch unrealizable projects, excite colleagues, organize useless meetings and deep down everything is to feel surrounded by doing things.

Professionals with borderline traits can be discovered BECAUSE:

  • They show affective instability, with marked emotional lability.
  • Sometimes they have inappropriate outbursts of anger.
  • Your interpersonal relationships are unstable and intense.
  • They are infatuated but fickle and tend to hang out with each other.
  • They are impulsive and show risky behaviors.
  • They go through cycles of euphoria and depression, even within a few hours.
  • They do not tolerate loneliness or inaction.
  • They have many outbursts of anger.

How to behave and communicate with an unstable boss?

  • They need people to order their activity and make up for their lack of reflection.
  • At the moment in which they “turn off the batteries” the collaborators must replace them at the head of the organization and must encourage them.
  • You have to stay away from their whims, avoiding being manipulated or entering their fantasies.
  • Also avoid believing all the projects that you are going to propose.

The most important thing for an unstable professional is

  • Learn to commit to something.
  • Learn to get frustrated, that things take effort and time to achieve.
  • Learn to value the reasons of others, their motivations and to what extent they may be right.
  • Perceiving yourself as immature, and in need of maturation. Surround yourself with good advisers, people who supplant your disorganized tendency and temper your own impulses.

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