10 benefits of frustration and how to start overcoming it

From the time he sat down, I knew he was bringing bad news. I was not wrong. He was about to leave the project that had cost him years of work. The reason? He was going through a "bad streak."

I listened and thought it was temporary, that she had a lot of potential, that with a couple of adjustments her business was going to grow. But it was difficult to convince her. Marta couldn't see what I did. It felt like a failure, I was in frustration.

It is normal for frustration to visit us at different times in life. It occurs when what we dream of, or what we have worked for, does not happen. It is part of what we have to live. What can we feel in front of her? To a greater or lesser extent:

• A strong disenchantment for life.
• Disappointment, trapping us in emotional paralysis.
• The desire to "run away and leave everything thrown away".
• Doubts regarding our capabilities.
• Tendency to bury dreams.
• Want to tie ourselves to our comfort zone.
• Increased fears.

Frustration can become our worst enemy. It could introduce us to a vicious circle of fear and failure. If I feed disenchantment and act accordingly, I cause more failures which in turn fuel frustration.

Frustration can be our friend

If we do a survey, probably no one likes to feel frustration. However, there is another side to this coin.

What many do not take into account is that well managed frustration can bring multiple benefits:

1. It can help us develop good sense and prudence, meanwhile it allows us to analyze why things did not happen. This without guilt and without fear. It's about understanding the reasons.

2. We can approach failure as a new challenge, which allows us to rethink our strategy and renew our vision. (The other option is to throw in the towel and this does not apply to people who want to achieve dreams.)

3. It sharpens our senses. We realize that we can fail and it takes us out of our comfort zone. When we are alert we can develop our full potential.

4. Helps to build character, create a strong will. Each fall puts us in front of the possibility of continuing our work with discipline and commitment..

5. It is a source of learning as long as we can identify areas for improvement and take the necessary measures to acquire the necessary knowledge. We also learn more about life and ourselves.

6. It allows us to mature, to assume life with realism. Not always will everything work out. This implies developing the ability to always be relaunching our challenges and giving things their proper dimension..

7. Paradoxically, it can be a source of motivation When we put pride aside, we allow ourselves to recognize the shortcomings, to strengthen the vision we have of our projects.

8. It allows you to know yourself better. It prompts you to introspection, to treat yourself with mercy and understanding. Above all, to be very honest with yourself about our strengths and weaknesses..

9. The above implies developing self-confidence, aside from criticism and the consequences that it often implies. You can learn to avoid self-blame and mindless fears.

10. Frustration can prompt action. It is the way to transform our dreams into actions that promote being able to live the life we ​​dream of, based on the work we do..

So what do you choose?

Life has to be embraced in all its chapters, in all its colors. Sometimes they will be light, other times dark. Sometimes with fear, sometimes with joy. We are clear that there is no perfect life.

But unless we have a condition such as depression, which is another matter and deserves professional treatment., we can choose to face frustrations with hope and courage.

Give up on our dreams because some things went wrong, is to live prisoner of our failures. Giving up our ability to shape our history is to stop being the protagonists of everything we can build.

• Are you willing to embrace frustration as the source of your motivation??
• Are you going to allow yourself to see frustration as a moment of analysis and emotional growth??
• Are you ready for frustration to show up in your day-to-day life, like a tenant you can't get rid of??

I hope you can allow yourself to dream and believe that the best is yet to come, while working hard to reach your goals..

Emotional fragility

One of the most severe effects that I have found as a consequence of the mismanagement of frustration is developing an excessive "emotional fragility. "

When we have run into the wall of frustration time and time again, it is normal that we live by the code of "No". This atrophies our development processes since it stagnates us in doubts and fear..

I would like to propose you to make a review, based on these questions:

• Why do you have to see everything in the negative?
• Why do you use victimization before the demand?
• Why refuse to grow up, simply because you don't want to hear that there may be alternatives to what has not gone well for you?
• What does it give you to give up without first doing a thorough review?
• Why in the face of a reasonable argument, do you have a complex emotional reaction?
• Do you consider that you are willing to grow?

For a person who is emotionally very fragile, answering these questions can be difficult. So is recovering from the loss of illusions.

We all have the right to our emotions: to express them and to live them. But we need to identify when from them we are creating complications that progressively move us away from our goals, dreams and illusions.

At this point, which anyone could reach, it is necessary to act. In many cases the direction of someone trained is necessary. Guidance from a professional can help you see the big picture and find a way out.

It is really important that, faced with the facts, we have the ability to see things as they are. It is the only way to grow and see life from a healthy perspective.

Frailty or tantrum?

I think one way or another we know when to throw a tantrum to avoid assuming our responsibilities or simply not to assume that we do not want to change.

Misunderstood frailty can become a defense mechanism. From there you refuse to grow and seek help. This of course will always hurt us, because what we do not like will be repeated over and over again..

Expressing emotions is not a weakness, it is normal and necessary. But turning this into a tantrum makes us fragile and complicated people. This from no perspective is going to help us in our integral growth processes..

This attitude arises out of frustration. But the concept that I am proposing to you in this article is see frustration as a source of motivation. It requires making an effort and with or without help to make a change of vision.

If you give yourself the opportunity to see life positively, not idealistically, but with arguments, learning from each experience, a mistake is not a failure, it is a learning experience..

Frustration must put us in front of reality. But you have to be careful, if you deceive yourself by constructing a truth that accommodates your disordered emotions.

Honesty: a starting point

Where do I begin? How do I turn frustration into a healthy, positive, constructive experience? The first step is an honest account of the situation and taking responsibility. I invite you to start by asking yourself these questions:

• What do you gain from building a truth that does not fit the facts?
• What brought you here?
• What are your justifications?
• Why do you allow yourself to listen only to yourself?
• How far will your self-delusions go?

Building a half-truth about facts that are objective and convincing yourself every day of it, ends up being distressing and painful. In the silence of your reflection you know what the truth is.

At the end of the day, you are the protagonist of your story. There are those who blame others for what happens to them in life. But if you think about it, you are always the one who chooses at the last moment. Assuming the truth helps us to:

• Understand what happens. It is easier to find new strategies to face life if we start from reality, however stark it may be..
• Recognize our liability shares, without turning the emotions over and over again. The challenge is to determine why something did not happen in a simple way and to look for changes based on facts and not emotions.
• Make good decisions In the meantime, we are more clear about the why and why of each action that we are going to undertake.

Emotional wisdom is not an idyll. We can all learn from every action, from every situation, if we approach the source of humility that makes us see our mistakes without senseless blame.

In short, internal freedom grows when we see things as they are. Assuming reality allows you to establish concrete action strategies.

Faced with events that cause us pain and frustration, as a first choice, it is good that we can build a truth, but this will only lead us to the door of confusion, sadness, doubt and contradiction.

Changes are born when we are clear with ourselves, and we can put aside cheap justifications, that all they do is damage our hearts.

Have you been in this for a long time? Don't you think the time has come to say no more?

☾∞