As much as they tell you that love is complicated, it is not. Love is simple, it is a gift, that is why it goes beyond any person and encompasses all life. That is the reason why philosophers, metaphysicians, and even teachers and saints speak of unconditional love.
Unconditional love for the cosmos, the universe, the earth, air, water, fire, the entire atmosphere that surrounds the planet, as well as minerals, plants, animals and human beings.
Nothing remains outside of him, because everything is born from him, say certain currents of Eastern philosophy.
When that love becomes property, that's when problems can appear.
When you believe that your partner is yours and that he must meet the requirements that you have imposed on yourself internally. Or even more, with the demands that culturally a good relationship is supposed to have.
Keep in mind that a good relationship is based on the trust of both and above all in the knowledge of the other. Of course to know your partner, you must know and love yourself first.
That is why, if you are in a relationship and experience certain behaviors that do not make you happy, turn on your alert.
Because something is wrong. That can happen for multiple reasons, but one of them may be that your partner does not consider the relationship as important and it ends up becoming a toxic relationship.
It is important to take into account a series of points to know if your relationship is on the right track.
Does this relationship make you great? That is to say: you feel that your partner supports you in your personal projects and is interested in them. It makes you feel beautiful, smart, capable. Increase your self esteem. With him you grow as a person.
Or on the contrary, does it make you small, limit you? He doesn't like your friends, or how you dress. What you do or what makes you enjoy seems silly to him. Only with him are you worth something. It makes you feel silly or worthless at times. And he's jealous of others.
If it looks more like the second than the first, things, make no mistake, do not look good. Better now than in the future.
Still, to increase your certainty, below we list a series of indications to consider so you know that you are no longer important to your partner.
When you love the other person, the first thing you want is to spend as much time as you can with them. You make a space for yourself to be with the other, regardless of work, commitments and family.
If this is not the case and you almost always have a excuse not to meet because he has meetings or various commitments, it is a sign that he does not want to be with you.
It also often happens that they meet only when the other wants them according to their times and comforts..
It is common that in all the outings you do, you never go with your partner. So you do not know their friends, nor do you participate in their social events.
Nor does it accompany you if you are the one who has a friend's birthday, or a wedding.
Likewise, and this is one of the hardest ways to find out, it is to have taken you to an event and minimize your presence there or do not even introduce you.
It may also happen that he does not tell you about things that are important in his life such as a promotion at work, a salary increase or an outing with friends..
All of this just points out that the person you are sighing for has no interest in sharing their life with you..
It is always you who should call and ask how he is, when they are not seen. And if they see each other, it is you who asks how he was, what he thinks, how he feels, which surely he will not answer very promptly, because he has no interest in letting you know.
For his part, he will never question you about what you do or details of your life. You will be the one who has to tell them. However, he will seldom remember them.
It is common for you to send him text messages or some WhatsApp, that he does not even look at them or that he answers them much later.
It is normal that sometimes this happens if you are very busy or in some situation that cannot be answered.
But if this is usual, it is a sign that he does not consider you important in his life, since when you really love your partner you want to know and communicate with her.
Although it is normal in a relationship for each of the members to have their independence, there are certain decisions that are made in consultation with the person you love. For trust, because you know that it will always seek your benefit.
Not doing this implies that they do not trust you, or that they think that you cannot contribute something positive to their problems. It can also mean that he does not respect your opinions..
A relationship is built in pairs. If, on the other hand, you feel that it only exists because you strive for it to continue, it is likely that you are carrying responsibilities that are not yours..
If at the same time you put aside your own life: how to be at certain times to wait for him in case he comes.
Or you cancel outings with your own friends because you expect me to call you, it is obvious that you are putting a lot of energy into a relationship that is not reciprocal.
When you decide to confront him for his lack of commitment in the relationship or his lack of attention, he immediately reacts or "takes offense".
The first thing they tell you is that you expect a lot from them, that you need a lot of attention. He advises you to do some activities so that you are not so aware of his behavior.
And when you insist that it is not that, but that you feel that they should be together longer, or deepen the relationship, he surprises you with phrases such as: "Now I don't want to have a serious relationship, but the one we have is great"; or "We can't be together now".
The best way to know if for your partner you are a priority or not, is to see what you feel.
If it is usual that you are sad, feeling that the relationship is full of doubts, uncertainty and even jealousy, it is advisable to end.
Although it seems very harsh, it is best to talk to the other person and distance yourself. Both deserve to have a relationship that makes them happy.
For a good and healthy coexistence as a couple it is important maintain a balance between both members based on love, respect, teamwork and trust in the other.
We are programmed to live as a couple and many times it is more about removing impediments and letting ourselves flow than having to make an effort to make things work.
Take into account these ideas today, and then listen to your feelings and your heart, really listen to them, they are almost never wrong. And if you still feel blocked, it's okay to ask for help.
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