Today Bert Hellinger is one of the most prominent figures in the field of psychotherapy. In order to understand his theory of systemic and family therapy, it is important that we keep in mind some relevant aspects of his life and training. Each of these experiences created the perfect environment for one of the key theories of the psychotherapeutic world to get going., the family constellation.
This distinguished psychotherapist was born in Germany in 1925. He studied at the German University of Würzburg, between the years (1947-1951). His training was in the areas of Philosophy, Theology and Pedagogy. In addition, he obtained a degree in arts from the Natal University of South Africa. After this, he studied at said university reaching the degree of University Education.
In addition to his university training, he focused his training on Primal Therapy, Hypnosis, Group Dynamics, Gestalt Therapy, Psychoanalysis, Neurolinguistic Programming, Psychodrama, Systemic Family Therapy and Transactional Analysis.
The interesting thing about Bert Hellinger is that he made an integration of all these studies and began to develop new theories. With this fusion the family constellations and the orders of love were born. Its most profound and recent evolution is grouped in the Movements of the Soul and the Spirit. In this, all the experience and maturation of his therapeutic and philosophical work is condensed..
After many scientific studies, it was possible to understand that we have a genetic code. Currently we are all aware that we have a DNA that genetically links us to our ancestors. If, for example, you have blue eyes, surely in your family history, there will be someone who also has them. That is much simpler to assume and understand since they are physical features capable of being palpated with the naked eye..
Now, the theory that has gained a huge following and placed Bert Hellinger among the world's key therapists is that we also have an emotional DNA. Surely, at this moment, you must be thinking that how is that going to be possible? If there is no physical relationship that can link our emotions to our ancestors. The truth is that this solution earned this great psychotherapy professional worldwide recognition.
At first glance and seen by the rational eye of science, it seems that it is almost impossible. But, if we start to analyze surely we will identify our characteristics that are inheritance of our parents or grandparents. Or suddenly, we can see similarities in the behaviors of many people to that of their ascending genealogy.
By looking at things from that point of view, surely we can already begin to understand that it is something totally supported by experimentation. In my case, I have always identified that the stubborn and vertical personality of my younger brother is a reflection of a very similar personality of my dad. I knew a girl who, in a similar way, had reflections of her behavior based on the characteristics of her relationship with her mother.
Energy in many cases is invisible to the eye, if we go to the law of conservation of energy we will remember the following postulate. Energy is neither created nor destroyed, it is only transformed. By integrating this statement with the fact that we are energy beings, then we can begin to think of everything we do has a direct impact on us or someone else.
Defining it as a family constellation leads us to think that our role within a family should be seen as a system. The clearest way to see it is by thinking about the universe, in a simpler way, we are going to think only about the solar system. The sun, like the star king, makes everything move around it, it gives us light and heat. The earth influences the orbit of its natural satellite; but at the same time, no matter how small the moon is, it influences the terrestrial tides.
Aware of this, we can think that many times things do not depend solely on our effort and desire. We probably associate many of the situations we experience with attribution processes. However, it may go further, and for those people who cannot find the course of their lives, a systemic and family therapy is necessary. This, so that the influence we have by the energies that our ancestors may have created, do not continue to affect our lives..
For example, let's imagine that a single girl falls in love with a committed man, he corresponds to this love and decides to leave his primary partner. Obviously a relationship is started on the basis of someone else's pain. That energy that is transformed there, can have an impact on the children of the new couple. If the new wife does not do forgiveness therapy with the old wife, it is very likely that her daughter or son will carry some of that energy over their lives..
This theory comes from all the influences that Bert Hellinger had. Among them, we can highlight transactional analysis and various hypnotherapy methods. Many of these observations gave a method of configuring family constellations.
The idea of understanding this systemic and family therapy is to direct the lives of people who are psychologically not in a state of happiness, and want to do something to change their life. Within the constellation, energy is generated in the form of vibrations. If we can understand that we can influence this energy field with recognition, assuming our actions and asking for forgiveness; we will surely do what the energy slope changes to give us a new scenario free of transgenerational inheritances. These we carry them unconsciously and they make us repeat behaviors from generation to generation.
The relationship with the mother is by far the main influence in each constellation. Bert Hellinger points out that the people who keep this mother-child relationship nurtured shine with their own light, and the universe brings them happiness. The path to happiness begins in the relationship with the mother, and of course; the relationship with the father also influences, but this is not the primary relationship.
We must accept that our way of responding emotionally speaking depends largely on our family constellation. By being aware of it, we can make the necessary changes to improve our emotional intelligence and reach a true level of happiness.
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