Throughout our lives we will have to live, whether we want to or not, with troublesome people.
There are many types of problem people. These types of people can be envious, negative, false, manipulative, disqualifying, etc. Is about harmful individuals that tend to complicate our existence and that seek to influence our decisions and behavior.
"The art of living is composed of 90% in the ability to live with people you can not stand" (Samuel Goldwin)
We can make a synthesis of what are the characteristics of these people who live among us, basically, to complicate our lives: they are people who only know how to talk about their achievements, they do not know how to listen, they discourage any project or illusion that you comment on them, they get angry and They yell frequently, they intimidate you and restrict your dreams, they are inflexible, they blame you for their problems, they always want to be right, they belittle your ideas, etc. Faced with this kind of attitudes we tend to be cautious, we live the interaction with them even with some fear and we feel relief when they disappear.
"The most mediocre beings can be great only because of what they destroy" (André Maurois)
We are not going to try here to analyze why these people behave like this, but we can affirm that their way of being is reflecting, most of the time, a troubled inner world (frustration, low self-esteem, envy, jealousy, insecurity, resentment, etc.) that should undoubtedly be solved.
"... bad people who walk and stink the earth ..." (Antonio Machado)
The behavior of all these people that causes us problems and discomfort is very difficult to bear and generates, many times, psychological distress. It is necessary to protect ourselves, to establish certain limits in the relationship with these people in order to “survive”. Obviously we are not going to be able to change these individuals, but we can change our attitudes and behaviors towards them.
It is your best "weapon". Do not depend on the evaluations that others make of you. Trust fully in your abilities and behaviors. What you think about yourself should be more important than the opinion that others have. The need for external approval can become a problem. You must believe in your potential. Remember that the only person who can "limit" what you are capable of doing is yourself..
Avoid troublesome people. It seems obvious, but many times we do not dare to cut with certain relationships that do not bring us anything or that only bring us negative aspects. Don't spend your time with people who aren't worth it. Try to surround yourself with people who encourage and motivate you to achieve your goals and dreams
Assertiveness is a social skill that consists of learning to defend your decisions before others. We must be able to say "NO", to assert our rights in a correct way and with social skill..
We must make changes in our behavior, aimed at interacting in the most productive way possible with all these problematic people. Do not stop to evaluate or try to understand them, it is not worth it.
The sense of humor will help you de-dramatize the situation and disarm whoever tries to harm you.
Finally, a phrase that seems very accurate to me in relation to all those problematic people, and that should serve as a definitive resource ...
"To forgive is not to take too much into account the limitations and defects of the other, not to take them too seriously, but to play them down, with good humor, saying: I know that you are not like that!"
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