Let's start by defining what grief is. Grief is a normal and healthy response to a loss. Characterizes the emotions you feel when you lose someone or something important.
The people are afflict for many different reasons:
The loss that triggers grief is not always physical. There may be griefs over the future plans you had made or the different life changes.
Grief is described as a 5-stage process: denial, anger, negotiation, depression, and acceptance. All of these reactions to loss are normal..
Not all losses refer to death, suffering losses such as: divorce, separation, job loss, unexplained life changes, etc..
J.W Worden comments that talking about phases and / or stages can place the person in a passive position facing their pain, where it is not possible to do anything other than wait for the stages to follow..
This is why this author prefers to talk about grief tasks, to place the person in a more active position to face it.
The person is required to learn to open up to the emotions they experience, without judging them, or fighting against them and making sense of them, in order to gradually assume the loss, reposition it in their life and continue moving forward on the path.
The tasks proposed by Worden are:
Learn to distinguish between intellectual acceptance and emotional acceptance. It is necessary to recognize and live the emotions that the loss has generated.
Denial makes it difficult to move on with our lives, and it makes it difficult to work through grief. This is why it is extremely important to accept the reality of loss and the emotions it generates..
In order to work on the emotions that arise during the grieving period, it is necessary for the person to be aware of what emotions are being experienced and allow themselves to feel them.
Trying to evade the emotions that are manifested is not recommended, since it prevents the mourning from working properly.
Worden talks about 3 areas of adaptation that must be addressed after the loss:
a) External adaptations: How the loss influences the day-to-day of the person.
b) Internal adaptations: How the loss influences the image that the person has of themselves, fundamentally in the definition they make of themselves and in their sense of personal efficacy.
c) Spiritual adaptations: How the loss influences a person's beliefs, values, and assumptions about the world. The person will have to learn to take on roles they are not used to, develop skills they never had, and move on with a new sense of themselves and the world..
This task consists of finding a place for the person who has left that allows the person to be linked with them, but in a way that does not prevent them from continuing with their life.
We must find ways to remember loved ones who have passed away by taking them with us, but without stopping us from continuing to live (Worden, 2004).
It is not about giving up the deceased, but about finding a suitable place for him in his emotional life..
It is the act by which a person intentionally causes death. It is usually the result of despair derived from or attributable to a physical illness, a mental illness such as depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, or borderline personality disorder.
The alcoholism or substance abuse. Also problems in interpersonal relationships or psychological harassment.
Generally, people who think about suicide tend to withdraw physically and emotionally from people. They are so locked in their thoughts of "pain", "trauma", "illness", etc., that they completely isolate themselves from their environment.
Most suicides occur impulsively in moments of crisis where there is no reflection to find a solution, they go blind and think that there is no other way out.
If you are thinking about suicide, ask for help! Do not allow this thought to be in your mind all the time. There is ALWAYS a solution, give yourself the opportunity to live with peace and joy.
It is a mechanism in which, based on an act or omission, we make a moral judgment of our conduct (including our thoughts) and “rule” that we have made a mistake and we should be punished..
The feeling of guilt is accompanied by emotions such as sadness, anguish, frustration, helplessness, or remorse, and repetitive and unproductive thoughts. The feeling of guilt is determined by our interpretation and assessment of the facts.
It is an emotion experienced by people who are convinced that they have caused harm by not having done something else for the deceased person, and they tend to have negative judgments towards their people.
According to the cognitive current, it is the thoughts that cause these emotions, thinking that one is responsible for the discomfort or misfortune of another person.
It is important that we bear in mind that people who survive a suicide of a loved one, are not responsible for the decisions of the person who committed the act. The person who decides to commit suicide will do so, regardless of whether their family and friends agree or not.
When you feel guilty about this fact, it is important to seek professional help. It is exhausting and can become paralyzing if you experience it without professional help..
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