Obsessing over a person is a situation that can happen to anyone at the least expected moment of their life. To overcome a situation of this type, it is important to know beforehand why this fact occurs, in order to combat and overcome it..
First of all, it is important to know how the mind works when it is obsessed with another person. Whoever experiences this sensation feels that his mind is in the grip of a kind of emotional hijacking; That is, they are not able to control their thoughts or understand them, because they lose the notion of what is real, good and bad for themselves.
Thus, distorted thoughts occur, which end up dominating the head of the person who is suffering from said obsession. She feels unable to discern between what is real and what is not, creating many ideas that have little or nothing to do with reality..
Suffering an obsession of this type does not imply having a mental disorder. That is, any person is susceptible to going through a situation of this type, although there are some factors that can condition and lead us to it.
One of the most important is having low self-esteem. This generates insecurity and dependency, making us idealize the other person, undervaluing ourselves. That is when the obsession can take over the reins of the person's mind..
Another of the beliefs that makes us fall into this is to magnify the feeling. In other words, it is common for the obsessed person to think that their relationship is unique and special and that they will not be able to live something of such intensity with another person.
However, we must know how to detect when the relationship with that person is being destructive to ourselves and, therefore, put an end to it when we see that this is not giving us anything positive.
Stopping obsessive thoughts can be very expensive. However, it is possible as long as you have the emotional tools and, of course, the firm will to do it..
The first thing to do is occupy time. This is essential especially at a time when thoughts are out of control. Thus, keeping our attention on any activity that keeps us distracted will help that obsession disappear..
Another task that must be done and on which special attention must be paid is to see reality as it is. When we become obsessed with someone it is, in the vast majority of cases, because we have idealized that person.
However, it is necessary to do the exercise of opening your eyes and seeing what the current situation is like, whether it is due to an unrequited love or if it is due to a love failure. In both cases, we must assume reality as it is and understand that no matter how much we stop to think about it, it will not change..
Once this is assumed, it is also important to expand our social circle. And it is that being distracted with activities and new people will give us a perspective that, when we are obsessed, we lose completely..
We can also lean on our loved and trusted ones. In addition to talking and venting, it is important to know how to listen to other similar stories that can help us see things more clearly, since when we are immersed in a situation of this type it is difficult for us to glimpse the way out..
Turning ourselves into work, in a new project, in training or starting new activities will make us focus on different aspects and, in this way, the head gradually detoxifies from the memory that is causing so much damage..
It is also very important to find a motivation that makes us grow as people, cultivate ourselves and feel better about ourselves. This is essential, since the obsession is highly fueled by low self-esteem. Therefore, working on ourselves is going to the root of the problem.
Psychological help will also be of great help at such a time, since the person who is obsessed with someone feels that they cannot control their mind or thoughts. Therefore, talking to a professional can help this end more quickly and save us many days of suffering..
In short, obsessing over a person is nothing more than a sign that we have a problem of lack of self-esteem that we must work on. Only when we put ourselves ahead of other people can we face this situation and get out of it.