In Rational Emotive Behavioral Therapy, we define rational thoughts, appropriate feelings, and affective behaviors as those that help human survival and happiness. These are the goals that practically all beings of our species choose during their life, to continue the existence that is given to them at birth and to try to continue life with reasonable happiness and relatively free of pain or discomfort..
When we say in a speech oriented to rational emotional therapy, that a person is rational, by common we mean that he has decided or chosen to live happily for certain reasons: Accept what actually exists in the real world, try to live amicably in a social group, interact intimately with some members of your community, engage in productive and enjoyable work, participate in selected recreational ventures. Irrationality or feeling and acting inappropriately consists of unjustifiably interfering in someone's life or causing unnecessary harm to oneself.
As we have commented previously, the TREC maintains that when people have emotional consequences, after an activating experience, the latter contributes to causing an emotional state, their belief system leads to activating certain emotions of like or dislike, comfort or discomfort, discomfort or well-being. For example, they feel depressed after being rejected by someone, the rejection does not make them depressed, but their beliefs about this rejection lead directly to the feelings of depression.
They tend first to have a set of rational beliefs that come from their basic value system, their desires and their preferences, since they want to stay alive, feel happy and achieve acceptance from others, they will almost always find rejection, as, undesirable, They will conclude that: I do not like to see myself rejected, What a misfortune! Then they will feel worry, discomfort, perhaps depression, disappointment, regret.
They also tend to have a set of irrational beliefs, such as: I must be accepted by other people who are significant to me, I have to get what I want, and if I am rejected, it will be terrible, I will not be able to bear it. Rejection will make me a bad person, undesirable, with little value! Then they will feel depressed, self-deprecated. Their irrational beliefs almost invariably come from intensifying rational desires and preferences into absolutist demands or demands. With such beliefs, they no longer want to have what they want but rather think, in a demanding way, that they must have it, for which they will feel frustrated, depressed.
The rational emotional therapist psychologists face and debate the irrational beliefs of their patients, in a much more active and energetic way, they make their patients see that their philosophies are irrational and counterproductive, they explain to them how those beliefs create emotional disorders, they teach them how to attacking them on logical and empirical grounds, they instruct them on how to dispose of them. They help them uproot their irrationalities, motivating them to do emotional exercises and assigning them tasks that serve to destroy their rigidly held ideas..
When we think, we also feel and act, when we feel, we simultaneously think and act and when we act, we think and feel.
To measure personality change, the TREC adopts a strict practical method: that the goal of therapy is to help people to be better and not simply to feel better. This means that patients not only have significant improvement of their symptoms and see themselves leading happy lives, but also experience profound philosophical changes in their attitudes towards themselves, towards others and towards the world around them and what if they did arise any new harmful conditions are unlikely to seriously disrupt them.
Here we share some of the steps of the TREC process, to minimize, diminish and even counteract irrational beliefs. It should be mentioned that this is only a brief exercise to get an idea of what is worked in Psychotherapy.
It is terrible to see myself and feel rejected by someone.
What am i saying to myself?
What is the idea that I want to face?
Is this hypothesis of mine true?
Then, try to give yourself an answer rationally, that is, based on reality and facts, rather than your assumptions..
If any of your answers were, that this or that thing is true, then ask yourself another question such as:
Where is the evidence that it is true? O Where is the evidence that it is not true?,
Now, in case your belief turns out to be true, you can ask yourself another question:
What's the worst that could happen if ... ?,
For example, if a woman rejected me?
You may think: I would feel sad for a while ... but it would not be terrible, I can find other opportunities and learn from my experiences, I will keep trying.
Try to ask yourself this method of questions, until you get sensible answers, this will lead you to feel better, you may experience somewhat unpleasant emotions, but not intense ones that cause disorders in your life.