Without pretending to judge or be an accusing finger, I would like to make a reflection as a spectator of the relationship and the effect that may have when a mobile and a child join.
When I say child, I mean under 13 years of age. In older ages we already talk about adolescence and mobile, and those are major words, and there we can do little, except to be there. The relationship is already so strong that no one can separate them. Although we must never forget that we are adults and that we must protect them. It is not to dominate, it is to protect and set limits, whatever the age.
Returning to the children, during a recent trip, I have been an observer of several situations that have led me to want to reflect on it.
Specifically, they have been situations in Disney Park and on the plane.
Perhaps all of us who have children have experienced the situation of using the mobile phone or the television for children to eat, and it is something that produces so much relief that we do not even consider doing it without it. So far we can control everything, or so we think ... But are we doing it right??
Then they grow up a bit, you want to go out, and they are given your cell phone so that while we have dinner they "don't disturb". Do we have everything under control? I think we start to lose it, the child kicks and misbehaves until he has the mobile. Won battle. Everything could have a pass if asked at least "please". But, in one of the scenes experienced, in which I was an observer due to circumstances unrelated to this story, the request was in the form "give me the cell phone", he only had to say "at the order of now".
At first they were not going to give it to him because his behavior was not being entirely correct, but the insistence and the worst behavior, ironically led him to get what he wanted, they gave him the mobile phone just to keep quiet. And everyone happy. There I leave the situation, but it is not isolated, it is something that is becoming more and more common, and it is normalizing, making children tyrants. We are doing them a disservice, thinking that it is for them to entertain themselves.
But the situation that has made me reflect the most on this is the following.
Disney parade, a lot of children with enthusiasm, waiting for the first character to appear, and among all that excitement, a child resting lying down playing with the mobile. So far everything normal and understandable, it was hot and the wait was a bit long. But the parade begins and the boy continued there, lying down, with his mobile, while the parade of illusion of children passed. I could'nt believe it. Grief and anger invaded me.
Perhaps it is a very extreme situation, but if we think about it, aren't we making a bit of a mistake with the use and relationship of children and mobiles? They are not mature, we are, supposedly. They cannot have everything they want, and the mobile is something that used well is an advance, but we have to control its use starting with ourselves. The example that we give regarding its use in front of them is fundamental.
How old is the right age for a child to have a mobile? As Judge Calatayud says, children should not have a mobile until at least 14 years old, although now, we are calmer if when they go to ESO they have a mobile, because they begin to have a little more independence.
But the truth is that they are not mature enough, and as Judge Calatayud also says, "we must violate their privacy" by looking at the mobile from time to time. But what has been said, that is another topic that would be to treat as another stage.
As for the little ones, perhaps we should consider trying to encourage them to read more, for example, or always carry a notebook and a pencil, that they paint, play scratch, to read stories in those moments when we want them to be "entertained" . Bring a small toy. That is to do them a favor, We would help them to increase their creativity, and not to learn that for entertainment there is only that useful little machine but that sometimes it is a double-edged sword, called mobile.
We have all done it and we all make mistakes, but if we want the new generations to truly have autonomy and develop their personality and creativity, we must not go easy..
And if they use their mobile phones, let them do it with us, let us share with them, look for information, and see interesting things, and why not, play shared games with them or watch funny videos. But don't be left alone with your mobile. If we do not realize it, they can spend hours playing with it, and "they get stunned".
The fact that the mobile is a Communion gift is not a good idea. It seems like the best gift you can give, and at those ages it can create a lot of conflict to say "I already have a mobile and you don't".
Let us not deprive them of childhood, and let them play and develop. The rest in a few years will come implicitly and we will not have much more to do, except protect them and continue informing them of how to make good use of technologies, despite the fact that they believe they know everything and that we are out of date.. It is a stage that is better spent together.
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