Why might a child have trouble making friends?

Jonah Lester
Why might a child have trouble making friends?

All the situations that happen to us on a daily basis influence our life, so it is important to recognize that an adult forms his personality according to how he lived his childhood. Within this it is worth mentioning the associated causes why your child has problems making friends, below you will show that there are factors, apart from his personality, related to this at the level of: development, sensory and social.


  • Verbal learning deficit
  • Difficulty at the level of attention and / or language
  • Executive functioning difficulty
  • Sensory deficits
  • Shyness
  • Abrupt and unexpected change of school
    • Conclusions

Verbal learning deficit

This kind of learning allows a child to have the ability to identify the social signals of other children, that is, if a child calls him and moves his open hand from one side to the other, he will know how to recognize that he is greeting him and therefore this will respond with the same non-verbal cue. Understands all language through facial and / or body gestures. At a general level, this can be a fundamental cause for your child to have problems making friends..

Difficulty at the level of attention and / or language

Today the term Attention Deficit with Hyperactivity (ADHD) is widely used in schools, but many do not know how it is characterized. A child with this disorder is characterized because at the level of thought, language and motor skills he is in constant activity, that is, he cannot self-control himself; which is manifested in: talking a lot, answering a question without thinking beforehand, not sitting for more than 5 seconds, among other characteristics.

In addition to this, an adequate interaction of your child with his classmates can be affected by the presence of a language disorder, which can hinder aspects such as: pronunciation, intonation and others. It is important that if you suspect this difficulty, you consult a speech therapy professional.

Difficulty in executive functioning

Another possible reason why your child may have problems making friends is at the level of presenting an executive malfunction. For which we are going to define this operation, it mainly encompasses 5 basic skills: attention, organizing and planning, starting a task, knowing how to handle emotions and being able to monitor the activity that is being carried out..

Taking this into account, when a child presents a certain difficulty in these executive functions, it can manifest itself in behaviors such as: problems with sharing, taking turns, among others.

Sensory deficits

Sometimes your child may have trouble making friends due to low sensory capacity, especially at the level of hearing and / or vision. Furthermore, this diagnosis can only be defined by a pediatrician who performs the relevant tests..


Sometimes in children under 18 years of age there are personality traits that indicate introversion, better known as shyness. Which is manifested as the difficulty of interacting with other people, in turn this can result in your child having problems making friends, it is important when this difficulty is identified, a management is made from Psychology to be able to train in social skills to the minor and with it that they have the necessary tools to interact satisfactorily with others.

Abrupt and unexpected change of school

Finally, it should be mentioned that sometimes your child may not present any of the situations previously exposed, since there are external situations that can lead to negative or no interaction in childhood. One of the most common is changing schools, which is sometimes not handled properly by parents. When this situation is unavoidable, the child must be prepared by stating the cause (s) and reaching agreements so that they can continue in contact with their friends..

When this situation has not been handled well either by the parents, due to the child's reaction, it is a priority that so that it does not produce greater repercussions, support from Psychology is requested to help provide a positive adaptation.


In conclusion, it is essential to remember that regardless of the factors that may be associated with your child having problems making friends as parents, they should always know how their child is, in order to know when to consult second opinions about it. Remember that the idea is to prevent and not have to regret!

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