Starting a relationship with the client is not easy when you have several intervention techniques and strategies: How to do it? Which one to use? Why? Will it be the most suitable for the client?
In this post I offer you a guide on the steps to take in a first session and serve your client in the best way.
1. Be clear about what you can offer and what your work style is, the paradigm from which you act, and communicate it to your client: it will help you to have security and give it to him / her, about whether you are the right person for him / her. In my case, the people who work with me know that the goal of every psycho-emotional development path is learn balance, focus, and fluency.
2. Be clear that every query starts from a need and is always the same: it is about the need of the person to regain a certain balance because something has happened and they are not feeling well.
3. Identify the source and cause of the imbalance: because every source of imbalance or discomfort is usually generated in the person by a way of facing what happens to him and having to do something, either with what affects him or with his way of taking it. In both cases, the element that is always present is the person's need to re-establish emotional balance..
4. Identify the need the person has on how to return to that balance: That need is the first thing we have to identify and the only thing we have to work with
5. Discuss with him / her the two possible strategies to resolve the conflict: There are two ways to resolve the conflict or imbalance marked by a person's need. One is to achieve what the satisfaction of that need supposes (way of Realization), and the other is to eliminate that need (way of Acceptance).
6. Help him choose the path: As a consequence of this need, the client can choose if he wants you to accompany him to try to change the outside, that is, to put into practice the necessary actions to change the situation, or to change his way of facing it, that is, to try to build a meaning alternative to what happens to him, with which to feel more comfortable and accept the situation.
7. Make expectations clear: The easy way does not exist between the two, since each one always hides pitfalls, difficulties and not entirely pleasant surprises. In fact, both paths present and start from the same initial need.
8. Sign an agreement (commitment to help) defining very well for which of the two ways you are going to help.
It is the path of resilience and detachment, of understanding that accepting a reality does not mean resigning, but learning to value the positive aspects and glimpse the opportunities it hides.
If a boy reaches the age when he decides to accept that he will not be a professional footballer for studying a career, this does not mean that he will spend his whole life with the doubt of not knowing what would have happened if he tried, but that he will accept to live with certainty having made a decision that presents the opportunity to study a career and become a professional in the branch that corresponds to him.
The strategy of my intervention with which I work in these phases is based on the Mindfulness Positive Psychology and Cognitive Psychology. The main strategic line is to accompany the person to detach from their own initial need to be a footballer, to live in peace without it. Eliminated the need that causes the discomfort, the discomfort will be eliminated.
It is the way of defining ambitious goals and action plans. The path of powerful motivation, commitment and improvement. This path requires doing everything that is necessary (and sometimes even more) to achieve the goal of satisfying the person's need..
Reaching the summit of Everest without oxygen is an achievement that requires great effort and a focused and sustained focus over time. If the person does not accept the possibility of not having tried, they will have to comply with several stages of a very long-term plan of action that requires from gathering the means, to having the time, such as overcoming failures and accumulating sufficient experience.
The level of commitment to the client does not change, although in this case the job consists of keeping him tied and attached to that need and will, even at times when he may consider giving up. The Positive Psychology and Humanist Psychologya are the referential frameworks of the work in this aspect, although the style of action I use is that of the Executive and Team Coaching.
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